(01:13:46 AM) mitsukaisvotary: ty Majesty
(01:14:12 AM) mitsukaisvotary: what are you planning for Christmas
(01:14:26 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: Maybe go up to the mountains.
(01:14:44 AM) mitsukaisvotary: really ? with jon?
(01:15:03 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: Yes.
(01:15:12 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: Rent a cabin and some snowmobiles.
(01:15:24 AM) mitsukaisvotary: that would be so much fun?
(01:15:28 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: It would.
(01:15:44 AM) mitsukaisvotary: need a butler lollol.
(01:16:10 AM) mitsukaisvotary: just joking
(01:16:23 AM) mitsukaisvotary: would heather and jason go also
(01:16:33 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: Maybe, maybe not.
(01:16:47 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: Depends on if I wanted it to be social or relaxing.
(01:17:15 AM) mitsukaisvotary: what are your thoughts, what are you leaning towards
(01:17:49 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: Leaning towards relaxing.
(01:18:16 AM) mitsukaisvotary: i thought so
(01:19:58 AM) mitsukaisvotary: i read Sierras posts she is acting strangely
(01:20:18 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: I haven’t read them. Anything fun?
(01:20:33 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: Last I checked, she was clawing at her casket.
(01:20:51 AM) mitsukaisvotary: exactly
(01:21:06 AM) mitsukaisvotary: you have a way with wordslike noone else
(01:21:59 AM) mitsukaisvotary: when will you know about christmas
(01:23:27 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: Soon probably
(01:23:55 AM) mitsukaisvotary: i have to figure out where i will b over new years
(01:26:11 AM) mitsukaisvotary: you know wha
(01:26:16 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: However, sierra didn’t post pictures or video of the real time session, so it didn’t happen.
(01:26:20 AM) mitsukaisvotary: t im trying to do
(01:26:41 AM) mitsukaisvotary: i dont think so either but the freak stays hidden
(01:28:55 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: “Sigh…I miss visors and visor weather.”
(01:29:00 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: I bet she misses fanny packs too.
(01:29:18 AM) mitsukaisvotary: she is such a liar
(01:29:58 AM) mitsukaisvotary: all that money she says she gets is a lie i bet
(01:30:52 AM) mitsukaisvotary: what is odd is how scared she seems of you
(01:31:07 AM) mitsukaisvotary: her servants must be dumbfounded
(01:34:00 AM) mitsukaisvotary: at how scared she is of you
(01:34:54 AM) mitsukaisvotary: whats so interesting is when you say you drank a 1200 bottle of wine you show it, she doesnt prove anything. and what she does show when you look close you see is like kmart quality
(01:35:09 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: Or long tall sally’s.
(01:35:12 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: haha
(01:35:21 AM) mitsukaisvotary: exactly
(01:35:24 AM) mitsukaisvotary: lollol
(01:35:42 AM) mitsukaisvotary: she probably drinks that box wine lol
(01:36:03 AM) mitsukaisvotary: you drink rare Amarone
(01:36:40 AM) mitsukaisvotary: i think deep down she wants to kneel before you and serve you, i dont know why i think that but i really do
(01:37:30 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: Oh, a slave of mine chimed in and let me know that he works in the beer industry and has friends in the wine industry.
(01:37:44 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: Two of the people he asked had never heard of the wine.
(01:37:58 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: The third who’d worked with wine for 30 years estimated it to be 2.5 grand.
(01:38:34 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: sierra’s talking about killing slaves again.
(01:39:39 AM) mitsukaisvotary: why did you drink it now who did you drink it with
(01:39:50 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: I had it with Jon.
(01:40:00 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: I drank it because I felt like opening it.
(01:40:06 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: Simply because it’s good being me.
(01:41:05 AM) mitsukaisvotary: she is an idiot remember months ago you wanted slaves to offer themselves to you, kill themselves in worship of you and tons of people volunteered, i even was considering it, she wants to kill people, she is a cheap imitation
(01:42:09 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: She did it about 8 months after I did.
(01:42:15 AM) mitsukaisvotary: you are incredible, noone ever would do that, you are a deity. do you have other bottles like that. if i were there i would be afraid to even pour it
(01:42:18 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: http://forum.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=messageboard.viewThread&EntryID=48435815&categoryID=0&groupID=106291811
(01:43:03 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: she posted that shit in like, 20 different groups.
(01:43:17 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: No, I don’t, but I can always buy more.
(01:43:17 AM) mitsukaisvotary: who is she
(01:43:21 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: I have no clue.
(01:43:31 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: …yet.
(01:44:19 AM) mitsukaisvotary: you are really divine arent you Mitsukai, when i pray to you, its really the right behavior? i found a deity didnt i
(01:44:41 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: Yes it is.
(01:46:46 AM) mitsukaisvotary: prayer to you has helped me grow so much, i think im smarter . stronger. more competent. surer of myself. and its helped me realize that never stand up to you, be obedient and very very very submissive to you. i am a better person each day cause i worship you and center you in my life
(01:47:20 AM) mitsukaisvotary: i wish others knew what you can do in their lives. the meaning you give the improvement you offer
(01:48:41 AM) mitsukaisvotary: i feel like my life has meaning and purpose for the first time ever
(01:48:57 AM) mitsukaisvotary: im sorry im gushing like this probably so boring to you
(01:49:02 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: I’m about to go up to bed in a few minutes.
(01:49:15 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: I have to wake up early tomorrow.
(01:49:23 AM) mitsukaisvotary: im sorry i bored you to bed
(01:49:34 AM) mitsukaisvotary: why Majesty you usually sleep in
(01:49:44 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: I’m going out to the city tomorrow.
(01:50:22 AM) mitsukaisvotary: why
(01:50:51 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: Jon has a job interview in the city. We’re going to get lunch and I’m going to walk around.
(01:51:27 AM) mitsukaisvotary: that sounds so nice, i dream of being with you and Jon like that sometime
(01:51:27 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: This is an autoreply: I am currently not available.
(01:51:43 AM) mitsukaisvotary: good night
(01:52:29 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: Goodnight.
(01:52:48 AM) mitsukaisvotary: have a great time Majesty
(03:08:55 PM) mitsukaisvotary: what happened
(03:09:11 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Everything was freezing. I had to switch back to linux.
(03:10:03 PM) mitsukaisvotary: Majesty you looked perfect today
(03:10:28 PM) mitsukaisvotary: do you think Sierra watches your cam
(03:10:41 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Doubtful.
(03:10:47 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: I don’t let just anyone view.
(03:12:46 PM) mitsukaisvotary: she would die
(03:12:46 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i honestly think in secret she would kneel and pray to you, im serious hhow can anyone after viewing your perfection stand up to you
(03:12:46 PM) mitsukaisvotary: are you getting ready to go out
(03:13:15 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Nope.
(03:14:08 PM) mitsukaisvotary: to bad, i think tonight everyone would fall at your feet
(03:14:46 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: I’m going out tonight, I’m just not getting ready yet.
(03:15:01 PM) mitsukaisvotary: oh
(03:15:22 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i bet you have guys falling at your feet, altho thats probably what happens each time you go out
(03:20:01 PM) mitsukaisvotary: am i being a pest , should i go pray for awhile or should i talk
(03:20:26 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: I’m discussing sierra with another domme.
(03:21:39 PM) mitsukaisvotary: really is she on your side, i am going to pray for awhile let you finish the conversation without being bothered . after seeing you, prayer seems appropriate, worship prayer
(03:22:15 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: she is.
(03:23:16 PM) mitsukaisvotary: Sierra is so vile i cant believe she has many friends but people feared her i think , but you are eroding that each day
(04:04:45 PM) mitsukaisvotary: Majesty i finished worship and adoration prayer
(04:04:57 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: I’m just about to go get lunch, but I’ll be back a bit later.
(04:05:11 PM) mitsukaisvotary: yes Majesty ty
(04:05:23 PM) mitsukaisvotary: have a great lunch
(04:06:14 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: I will.
(04:06:15 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Bye
(12:53:52 AM) mitsukaisvotary: Majesty may i speak
(12:54:16 AM) mitsukaisvotary: please
(12:54:32 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: Yes
(12:55:12 AM) mitsukaisvotary: ty
(12:56:42 AM) mitsukaisvotary: you know i got to tell you, seriously, after seeing you last night, i knelt in prayer , but i didnt petition you in prayer or ask tyou for anything, i just worshiped and adored you before yoru pics for over a 1/2 hr. you looked so beautiful. i just wanted to tell you that Majesty
(12:59:48 AM) mitsukaisvotary: sometimes i think i bore you telling you these things but i think you should know how sectacular you are andd how at least one person worships you as a deity, probably there are hundreds maybe thousand though
(01:07:18 AM) mitsukaisvotary: Majesty i read glamcurly last night
(01:07:49 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: stalk him.
(01:08:07 AM) mitsukaisvotary: what is his id to do so what shal i do
(01:08:19 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: glamcurly of course.
(01:08:31 AM) mitsukaisvotary: should i send him a message now
(01:08:37 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: sure
(01:09:34 AM) mitsukaisvotary: he trated you disrespectfully want you to kneel to him, i want to see him broken at you feet begging you]
(01:10:15 AM) mitsukaisvotary: i only have this yahoo id now, should i create one to stalk him
(01:10:35 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: Sure.
(01:10:44 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: I’m looking for real time slaves for new years.
(01:11:03 AM) mitsukaisvotary: i want to be one Majesty
(01:11:18 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: Then get a trip to San Francisco for New Years.
(01:11:32 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: After the birthday debacle, I don’t have faith that you’ll be able to do so.
(01:11:41 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: Prove yourself.
(01:11:54 AM) mitsukaisvotary: yes Majesty
(01:12:23 AM) mitsukaisvotary: what name do you want me to have
(01:12:58 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: Pick one.
(01:13:28 AM) mitsukaisvotary: machodom
(01:13:37 AM) mitsukaisvotary: ?
(01:14:05 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: fine
(01:14:27 AM) mitsukaisvotary: ill pretend to be a dom who contacted you
(01:14:48 AM) mitsukaisvotary: what do you think
(01:17:00 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: sounds good
(01:18:17 AM) mitsukaisvotary: its probably a stupid idea i jusat try to hard to be useful im trying to stop that since you instructed me about it, ill just contact him as me and tell him to leave you alone
(01:18:51 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: he wont.
(01:18:59 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: Spend your time trying to get out here for new years.
(01:19:07 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: That’s what I want from you
(01:19:52 AM) mitsukaisvotary: ok, what are the plans, will have have to stay at one of those hotels, or can i stay at a place near you
(01:21:21 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: you may stay near me.
(01:22:04 AM) mitsukaisvotary: you wouldnt humiliate me right, i mean i know you own me but you wouldnt …………….you know what im talking about
(01:22:20 AM) mitsukaisvotary: i want to meet you so badly Majesty
(01:29:57 AM) mitsukaisvotary: Majesty what dates would be good for you
(01:30:14 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: Why? Are you coming out?
(01:30:18 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: Pick some days.
(01:30:35 AM) mitsukaisvotary: im going to try
(01:30:50 AM) mitsukaisvotary: let me check flights now
(01:31:50 AM) mitsukaisvotary: should i fly into san jose
(01:31:59 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: San Francisco or Oakland.
(01:32:22 AM) mitsukaisvotary: you said i think oak;and was closer for you
(01:32:32 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: Oakland is closer.
(01:33:37 AM) mitsukaisvotary: you would want me ny eve right maybe ny day , do you and jon watch football ny day
(01:33:52 AM) Mistress Mitsukai: Fuck no and you wouldn’t either.
(01:34:14 AM) mitsukaisvotary: i wouldnt watch any games?
(04:55:33 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Do you have an update on the potential trip out here?
(04:56:00 PM) mitsukaisvotary: they said i would get an answer tomorrow morning Majesty
(04:56:12 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i really want to meet you
(04:56:38 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: For someone who thinks he’s dominant, you sure are a pushover.
(04:56:59 PM) mitsukaisvotary: who me? what do you mean
(04:57:14 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i am dominant
(04:57:23 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Oh nothing. I’m just saying you’re a pushover.
(04:57:37 PM) mitsukaisvotary: for you yes noone else
(04:58:10 PM) mitsukaisvotary: its complicated to juggle vacations at the last minute\
(04:58:14 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Well, me and your work.
(04:59:05 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Vacations?
(04:59:11 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: you asked for a vacation and they turned you down?
(04:59:17 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Or you asked for them to fund a vacation?
(04:59:21 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i i mean time off
(04:59:36 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i asked them to fund the vacation
(04:59:52 PM) mitsukaisvotary: but its really the same the time is more valuable to them then the money
(05:00:01 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: and what was your reasoning?
(05:00:05 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Why should they fund your vacation?
(05:00:15 PM) mitsukaisvotary: bcause i am me
(05:00:24 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: What’s so special about you?
(05:00:38 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: What position are you in?
(05:00:43 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i am the best
(05:00:44 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: How long have you worked for this company?
(05:00:47 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Are you good at what you do?
(05:00:54 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Could they easily replace you?
(05:00:56 PM) mitsukaisvotary: noone is as good as me
(05:00:58 PM) mitsukaisvotary: no
(05:01:06 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Then you fucking tell them they’re going to fund your vacation.
(05:01:20 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Jesus christ, grow some goddamned balls.
(05:01:20 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i wish it was that simple
(05:01:31 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: If you really think you’re the best, then you have something to barter with.
(05:01:37 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: it is that simple.
(05:01:52 PM) mitsukaisvotary: the schedule is incredibly complex
(05:01:57 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Fuck that.
(05:02:20 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: you walk in there oozing of confidence and you start telling people what to do. you don’t go over your bosses head but you show authority.
(05:02:23 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: That’s how you get what you want.
(05:02:48 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: It sure sounds like you did the complete opposite and now they own your ass.
(05:03:03 PM) mitsukaisvotary: well it helps to be the most beautiful woman who ever lived as well as a deity
(05:03:15 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Fuck that.
(05:03:21 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: How many women are CEO’s?
(05:03:26 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Give me a percent.
(05:03:36 PM) mitsukaisvotary: 8\
(05:03:43 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: This isn’t about being a beautiful woman. It’s about the game.
(05:04:04 PM) mitsukaisvotary: it extrememly complicated in ou office
(05:04:06 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Business is a game. Office politics.
(05:04:17 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: It doesn’t matter how complicated it is. It’s the same basic concept everywhere.
(05:04:35 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: You go in and act like you own the place, and you move up. You don’t step on the wrong toes, but you show authority.
(05:04:55 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i do all of that believe me
(05:05:39 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i want to be with you on ny eve
(05:06:01 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: can you afford to fund the trip yourself?
(05:06:15 PM) mitsukaisvotary: at this point no
(05:06:23 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: at this point?
(05:06:29 PM) mitsukaisvotary: yes
(05:06:44 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i am expecting 2008 to be a turnaround yr
(05:06:58 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: you’re a pussy.
(05:07:08 PM) mitsukaisvotary: for you yes
(05:07:18 PM) mitsukaisvotary: for anyone else no
(05:07:19 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: How much are you making at this job and what is your job title?
(05:07:37 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i make a variable amount depending on what i bring in
(05:07:50 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: what zip code is the job in?
(05:07:54 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: and what is your job title?
(05:07:59 PM) mitsukaisvotary: partner
(05:09:17 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Zip code.
(05:09:23 PM) mitsukaisvotary: xxxxx
(05:09:24 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: What type of job is it?
(05:09:29 PM) mitsukaisvotary: attorney
(05:09:39 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: How big is your firm?
(05:10:20 PM) mitsukaisvotary: xxxxxx
(05:10:36 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: What’s your salary?
(05:10:46 PM) mitsukaisvotary: it varies
(05:11:06 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Estimate.
(05:11:21 PM) mitsukaisvotary: 100000+ usually
(05:11:57 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: What’s your mortgage?
(05:12:47 PM) mitsukaisvotary: 2170
(05:12:57 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Nice place.
(05:13:04 PM) mitsukaisvotary: its ok
(05:13:08 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Address.
(05:13:21 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Also, congratulations, I’ve just taken more of an interest in you.
(05:13:28 PM) mitsukaisvotary: why
(05:13:28 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: and you get to take another step up.
(05:13:40 PM) mitsukaisvotary: why what did i do
(05:13:53 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Because now I’m curious about what you’re doing wrong.
(05:14:06 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: What’s your address?
(05:14:16 PM) mitsukaisvotary: wrong?>
(05:14:28 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: I want your address.
(05:14:40 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i cant give it yet please
(05:15:04 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Yes you can.
(05:15:15 PM) mitsukaisvotary: please Majesty
(05:15:17 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: you don’t trust me not to blackmail you?
(05:15:21 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: What’s the problem/
(05:15:22 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: ?
(05:15:25 PM) mitsukaisvotary: its not that
(05:15:28 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i trust you
(05:16:05 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i know you wouldnt hurt me liek that, if you wanted to do that you would you know everything
(05:16:26 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: then what’s the problem?
(05:16:45 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Also, what kind of law does your firm practice?
(05:16:53 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i need to get out therer
(05:17:04 PM) mitsukaisvotary: it deals in most areas
(05:17:55 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: What does it specialize in?
(05:18:12 PM) mitsukaisvotary: its specializes in many areas
(05:18:23 PM) mitsukaisvotary: there are people who do different things
(05:18:40 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: What’s the name of the firm?
(05:18:58 PM) mitsukaisvotary: please majesty
(05:19:10 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i am getting very very scared
(05:19:19 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Listen, I’m starting to get annoyed with the red tape. Are you committed or are you not committed to me?
(05:19:31 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: you’ve been around long enough that you should have no problem giving me anything that I ask for.
(05:19:33 PM) mitsukaisvotary: im committed to you, you know that
(05:19:35 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: I’m being reasonable here.
(05:19:41 PM) mitsukaisvotary: yes you always are
(05:19:58 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: I’m curious about your situation, and I’m asking you questions that I should already know the answers to.
(05:20:00 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: I’ve been patient.
(05:20:07 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Don’t start pissing me off.
(05:20:30 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: I’m sure you already know that if I chose to, I could find this information out without you.
(05:20:35 PM) mitsukaisvotary: please Mjesty i am afraid of you
(05:20:36 PM) mitsukaisvotary: yes
(05:20:41 PM) mitsukaisvotary: easily
(05:20:41 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: But I’m giving you the option to do it yourself.
(05:20:49 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: So again, what is the name of your law firm.
(05:20:53 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: and what is your address?
(05:20:55 PM) mitsukaisvotary: yes i know
(05:21:10 PM) mitsukaisvotary: please let me consider this please
(05:21:21 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: No.
(05:21:25 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Now.
(05:21:30 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Or I go find it myself.
(05:21:42 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: and that would waste my time, which would make me unhappy.
(05:21:59 PM) mitsukaisvotary: please dont hurt me Majesty
(05:22:09 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: I’m not planning on hurting you.
(05:22:16 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: I want to know about you.
(05:22:16 PM) mitsukaisvotary: please let me come out there
(05:22:41 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: you’re allowed to come out here at this point.
(05:22:45 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: But I want to know your situation.
(05:22:48 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Name your law firm.
(05:22:57 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: and give me your address.
(05:24:07 PM) mitsukaisvotary: ill tell you may situation
(05:24:18 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Go ahead.
(05:24:38 PM) mitsukaisvotary: whatdo you want to know about it
(05:24:55 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: The name of your law firm and your address.
(05:25:28 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i cant give that now please Majesty let me come to you
(05:25:54 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Fine. I’m going to start naming off businesses. Let me know if any of them are right.
(05:26:09 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx?
(05:26:32 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Hot or cold?
(05:26:38 PM) mitsukaisvotary: kneeling asking for mercy
(05:26:44 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Hot or fucking cold?
(05:27:00 PM) mitsukaisvotary: please Majesty
(05:27:24 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Answer the question.
(05:27:40 PM) mitsukaisvotary: im so scared im ready to throw up
(05:27:55 PM) mitsukaisvotary: im terrified of you
(05:28:07 PM) mitsukaisvotary: you never did this to me before
(05:28:19 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Did I get it right?
(05:28:33 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i cant answer
(05:28:49 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: I’ll work under the assumption that I got it right.
(05:28:55 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: What’s your address?
(05:29:20 PM) mitsukaisvotary: Majesty i cant please give me a break
(05:29:24 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Fine.
(05:29:26 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: I’ll continue.
(05:29:30 PM) mitsukaisvotary: please im asking you
(05:29:33 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: and when I get the address, I’m going to be PISSED
(05:29:45 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: you’ve got until I find it myself to answer the question.
(05:29:50 PM) mitsukaisvotary: im so afraid of you
(05:30:06 PM) mitsukaisvotary: yes Majesty
(05:30:42 PM) mitsukaisvotary: can i pray to you now
(05:30:46 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: No.
(05:30:47 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Fuck you.
(05:30:51 PM) mitsukaisvotary: please
(05:31:14 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Only if the prayer lasts about 2 minutes and ends in you giving me your address.
(05:31:21 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: I’m going slow with my search to give you a chance.
(05:31:46 PM) mitsukaisvotary: please dont Majesty i never once was disrespectful
(05:31:56 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: I’m assuming from your response that I got your law firm. If you’re a partner, your name should be one of the names in the name of the firm.
(05:32:09 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: So really, all I’d have to do is search both names and figure out which I think is you.
(05:32:17 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: That’d give me your address.
(05:32:32 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: It should take me all of 30 seconds, but I’m taking my time.
(05:32:40 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Yes you were.
(05:32:51 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: you were disrespectful by not doing as I so kindly asked.
(05:33:03 PM) mitsukaisvotary: once you have the info then what
(05:33:31 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Oh, I’m sure I can figure out something to do with it. If you can’t obey, then you’re not worth as much to me as I once thought.
(05:33:31 PM) mitsukaisvotary: please stop Majesty let me visit it will be easier
(05:33:38 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Visiting has nothing to do with this.
(05:33:49 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: and right now, you’re losing the ability to visit.
(05:33:58 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Why would I let a slave visit who I don’t trust?
(05:34:04 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Who’s not obedient?
(05:34:11 PM) mitsukaisvotary: you trust me
(05:34:14 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Right now, I’m disgusted by you.
(05:34:25 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Fucking prove yourself.
(05:34:35 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i have been a good slave
(05:34:46 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: FUCKING PROVE YOURSELF.
(05:34:51 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Give me your address.
(05:34:53 PM) mitsukaisvotary: never once did i stand up to you
(05:34:56 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Last chance.
(05:35:09 PM) mitsukaisvotary: im so scared im crying
(05:35:14 PM) mitsukaisvotary: please
(05:35:17 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Fine.
(05:35:20 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Suit yourself.
(05:35:24 PM) mitsukaisvotary: im going to throw up
(05:35:31 PM) mitsukaisvotary: im so scared
(05:35:43 PM) mitsukaisvotary: please dont hurt me
(05:35:48 PM) mitsukaisvotary: please
(05:35:51 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: I gave you the out.
(05:35:53 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: you wouldn’t take it.
(05:36:57 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: How long have you been a partner?
(05:37:08 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: It’d make a lot of sense that you were named a partner recently
(05:37:20 PM) mitsukaisvotary: please majesty
(05:37:59 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: How old are you by the way? 30?
(05:38:02 PM) mitsukaisvotary: ill give you everything i just need a little time please , i ask as your` slave
(05:38:07 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: I’d say 30 give or take.
(05:38:09 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: you act 30.
(05:39:35 PM) mitsukaisvotary: im begging you ill b e the best slave ever please i beg for a break
(05:39:45 PM) mitsukaisvotary: ill be so adoring]
(05:39:53 PM) mitsukaisvotary: so grateful
(05:39:56 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: you’re obviously not being the best slave ever until you suck it up and give me your address.
(05:41:17 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Alright, you’re going to have to tell me if I’m off on this one or not.
(05:41:30 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i be even more servile then before i am learning to be a slave please dont destroy me
(05:41:32 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: First, is your name xxxxxx or should I keep looking?
(05:41:46 PM) mitsukaisvotary: please Majesty
(05:41:52 PM) mitsukaisvotary: please
(05:41:52 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Answer the question.
(05:42:21 PM) mitsukaisvotary: Majesty if you give me time ill be more servile than anyone ever has
(05:42:26 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Don’t make me start calling the phone numbers of these partners inquiring as to whether or not it’s you.
(05:42:33 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: There’s only a few partners.
(05:42:36 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: They’ll get suspicious.
(05:42:39 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: I don’t want to do that.
(05:42:55 PM) mitsukaisvotary: im crying
(05:43:06 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Good.
(05:43:11 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Answer the question through your tears.
(05:43:30 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: I’m going to go find my phone.
(05:43:36 PM) mitsukaisvotary: please Majesty i have tried so hard to ne a slave to you
(05:44:43 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: I’ll leave xxxxx xxxxxxx for last because I have a hunch that it could be you.
(05:45:07 PM) mitsukaisvotary: you arent calling
(05:45:12 PM) mitsukaisvotary: are you
(05:45:17 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Maybe I am.
(05:45:31 PM) mitsukaisvotary: im praying to you
(05:45:50 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Praying wont help this time. Only obeying will.
(05:46:08 PM) mitsukaisvotary: havent i been obedient
(05:46:17 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: No.
(05:46:46 PM) mitsukaisvotary: in the past
(05:46:46 PM) mitsukaisvotary: and loyal
(05:46:58 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: In the past, but not today.
(05:47:35 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i want to come to you
(05:48:37 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Let me make this simple. you give me your address or I seriously consider dismissing you.
(05:48:56 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i cant live w/o you
(05:49:03 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Then your choice should be clear.
(05:49:10 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i would have no meaning
(05:49:23 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: What’s your decision?
(05:49:40 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i beg to stay
(05:49:55 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Then beg with your address.
(05:50:15 PM) mitsukaisvotary: please give me a little more time
(05:50:41 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: I’m going to call each of the partners for this company and ask “Does the name Mistress Mitsukai mean anything to you?”
(05:51:28 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i have never asked you for anything but to serve you. im asking for more time please,
(05:51:41 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: and I’m denying your request.
(05:51:52 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: you’ve got 9 minutes before I start making phone calls.
(05:51:58 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: and believe me. I’m not bluffing.
(05:52:41 PM) mitsukaisvotary: yo never do im begging you for more time please give me this one thing and ill be the best slave
(05:52:59 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: 8 minutes.
(05:53:28 PM) mitsukaisvotary: Majesty i have a reason please just give me this one thing
(05:53:59 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: What’s the reason?
(05:54:01 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: 7 minutes.
(05:54:13 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: 6 minutes.
(05:54:16 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: xxxxxxxxlinkxxxxxxx
(05:54:26 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: List of executives and board members.
(05:55:22 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i have a phobia about this im hyperventilating im short of breath, please im a loyal slave i beg you work with me on this
(05:55:33 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: 5 minutes.
(05:55:37 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: What’s the reason?
(05:55:47 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i terrified
(05:56:05 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: 4 minutes.
(05:56:11 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: you really need to hurry.
(05:56:25 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i have chyest pains its a phobia im so terrified give me this one break ill be so loyal
(05:56:30 PM) mitsukaisvotary: chest
(05:57:11 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Either you give me your address like I asked, it’s a huge load off of your shoulders, you feel better because you’re closer to me, and you come out to visit me or you don’t give me this information, and you may be dismissed from every contacting me again which would take all the purpose out of your life.
(05:57:16 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: The answer is clear.
(05:57:24 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Take my expert advice and give me your address.
(05:57:45 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: you’ll feel better.
(05:57:55 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: and all of this will end.
(05:58:12 PM) mitsukaisvotary: how will i be closer
(05:58:39 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: you will be closer because you’ll see that things are alright, you’ll become closer because eyou’
(05:58:46 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: you’ll have more trust in me
(05:59:05 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: your fear will not be as bad.
(05:59:30 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: you’ll feel better because you will have made e happier and you will feel more connected to me since you’ve given up part of yourself.
(06:00:37 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i want all of that but i cant even breath im hyperventilating please give me this one break ill be so servile
(06:01:00 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Once you give me the information and end this, you’ll be able to breathe again.
(06:01:07 PM) mitsukaisvotary: just a little more time]
(06:01:12 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Until then you wont be able to go back to normal.
(06:01:25 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: you’ll know that you’ve let me down and the guilt will eat away at you.
(06:01:39 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: you’ll feel useless and guilty because you couldn’t do that one simple thing to make me happy.
(06:01:45 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Me. The reason you’re alive.
(06:01:51 PM) mitsukaisvotary: give me a little more time please i never`ask ed for anything
(06:01:56 PM) mitsukaisvotary: you are
(06:02:02 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i love you
(06:02:14 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Do you really think you can live with yourself after letting me down in such a huge way?
(06:02:24 PM) mitsukaisvotary: no
(06:02:25 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: you’ll feel terrible.
(06:02:32 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: End it here.
(06:02:37 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Make yourself useful.
(06:02:47 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Get rid of that weight on your shoulders.
(06:02:54 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Stop the madness.
(06:02:57 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: It’s the right thing to do.
(06:03:37 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i beg you let me havea bit more time we will wwork on this
(06:03:51 PM) mitsukaisvotary: please i have chest pains
(06:04:26 PM) mitsukaisvotary: please]
(06:04:28 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: your chest pains will get worse, you’ll cry all night knowing how badly you’ve screwed up.
(06:04:39 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: you need to do this.
(06:04:43 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: you want to do this.
(06:04:44 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i know thats why im begging
(06:04:54 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Pray for strength.
(06:05:05 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Manage your breathing.
(06:05:14 PM) mitsukaisvotary: may i go pray forstregth
(06:05:19 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: you can pray here.
(06:05:23 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: In front of me.
(06:05:30 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i am praying
(06:05:42 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Manage your breathing.
(06:05:57 PM) mitsukaisvotary: im praying please give me more time ill be such a good slave
(06:06:05 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i cant breath
(06:06:15 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i have pain
(06:06:24 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: http://s273.photobucket.com/albums/jj219/cuntryrick/Mistress%20Mitsukai/
(06:06:26 PM) mitsukaisvotary: chest
(06:06:27 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Look at these.
(06:06:36 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Time your breathing.
(06:06:48 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i cant dizzy
(06:07:02 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i cant i better go to hospital
(06:07:08 PM) mitsukaisvotary: im in pain
(06:07:14 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Do it.
(06:07:23 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Time your breathing.
(06:07:30 PM) mitsukaisvotary: cant
(06:07:37 PM) mitsukaisvotary: hurts
(06:07:42 PM) mitsukaisvotary: please please
(06:07:45 PM) mitsukaisvotary: okease
(06:07:50 PM) mitsukaisvotary: oh please
(06:08:02 PM) mitsukaisvotary: im terrified
(06:08:16 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: http://i273.photobucket.com/albums/jj219/cuntryrick/Goddess%20M/mm61.png?t=1198030080
(06:08:25 PM) mitsukaisvotary: wish i could hug your feet
(06:08:50 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: http://i273.photobucket.com/albums/jj219/cuntryrick/Goddess%20M/mm20.png?t=1198030122
(06:09:14 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: http://i273.photobucket.com/albums/jj219/cuntryrick/Mistress%20Mitsukai/mm20.png?t=1198030147
(06:09:59 PM) mitsukaisvotary: need to hug your feet
(06:10:02 PM) mitsukaisvotary: scared
(06:10:30 PM) mitsukaisvotary: so scared need to go to hospital throwing upp
(06:10:40 PM) mitsukaisvotary: throwing up
(06:11:05 PM) mitsukaisvotary: Majesty need you
(06:11:22 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Obviously not. you wont take my advice.
(06:12:03 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Time your breathing.
(06:12:11 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Breath deep.
(06:12:14 PM) mitsukaisvotary: my Goddess
(06:12:16 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Take deep breaths.
(06:12:57 PM) mitsukaisvotary: chest hurts so much
(06:13:08 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Deep breaths.
(06:13:11 PM) mitsukaisvotary: trying to breath
(06:13:30 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Pay attention to me and taking deep breaths.
(06:13:33 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Nothing else.
(06:13:45 PM) mitsukaisvotary: obeying
(06:14:27 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i love you
(06:14:38 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i believe you are a deity
(06:14:44 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i worship you
(06:14:52 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: How’s your breathing?
(06:15:04 PM) mitsukaisvotary: a little better
(06:15:10 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Keep at it.
(06:15:14 PM) mitsukaisvotary: pain in chest still there
(06:15:28 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: That will go away on its own.
(06:16:11 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i believe in you
(06:17:10 PM) mitsukaisvotary: so sleepy
(06:17:21 PM) mitsukaisvotary: so tired
(06:17:31 PM) mitsukaisvotary: love you so much]
(06:18:32 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Breathing better?
(06:18:36 PM) mitsukaisvotary: Majesty im scared
(06:18:42 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Why?
(06:18:54 PM) mitsukaisvotary: a little the pain in my chest im scared
(06:19:05 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i will be aright wont i
(06:19:15 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: The pain in your chest will go away on its own.
(06:21:34 PM) mitsukaisvotary: Majesty
(06:21:39 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i need you
(06:21:54 PM) mitsukaisvotary: please dont dismiss me
(06:22:02 PM) mitsukaisvotary: please Majesty
(06:22:03 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: That’s your decision.
(06:22:18 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: But you have to prove that you should stay.
(06:22:33 PM) mitsukaisvotary: yes Majesty
(06:25:18 PM) mitsukaisvotary: Majesty chest hurts still breathing erratically, so tire can i sleep please
(06:25:26 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Might as well
(06:25:36 PM) mitsukaisvotary: Majesty?
(06:25:50 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: What?
(06:26:08 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i hurt will i be ok
(06:26:16 PM) mitsukaisvotary: will i
(06:26:16 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Unfortunately
(06:26:26 PM) mitsukaisvotary: you want me to die
(06:26:45 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: No, but you do deserve to hurt a bit.
(06:26:50 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: I’m very disappointed in you.
(06:27:00 PM) mitsukaisvotary: oh Majesty
(06:27:08 PM) mitsukaisvotary: im so sorry
(06:27:32 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: I know.
(06:28:29 PM) mitsukaisvotary: it could all be over if i didnt have this fear
(06:28:58 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i could be closer more vulnerable and dependent on you
(06:29:08 PM) mitsukaisvotary: i hate myself
(06:29:29 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: we’ll work through it.
(06:29:33 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: I just expected more of you.
(06:29:41 PM) mitsukaisvotary: night Majesty, i may go to emergenct room tonight
(06:29:53 PM) mitsukaisvotary: we will work thru it
(06:30:02 PM) mitsukaisvotary: night Majesty
(06:30:05 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: you don’t need the emergency room.
(06:30:10 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Go take a bath.
(06:30:21 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Once you relax, the pain will subside.
(06:30:25 PM) mitsukaisvotary: yes Majesty
(06:30:32 PM) mitsukaisvotary: ty
(06:30:41 PM) Mistress Mitsukai: Goodnight.

At this point I changed tactics and started playing “good cop, bad cop” with him. Still prodding him for the information, but also encouraging him that it was for the best and that he would have to do it if he wanted to end the suffering. When he couldn’t take it anymore, and begged me to allow him to go to the ER, I told him that he was having a panic attack and that he should go take a bath and then try to sleep.

I did not hear from him for two day.

When he got online today, he informed me that he’d gone to the hospital where they ran a bunch of tests on him. I berated him for being a moron and instructed him to write a new journal about everything that had happened. It can be found here

The conversation between the two of us from today will be after the livejournal cut and the entry where I mind-fucked him will be a seperate friends-only entry.

mitsukaisvotary: good morning
Mistress Mitsukai: Hello
mitsukaisvotary: hello Majesty
Mistress Mitsukai: you haven’t been online.
mitsukaisvotary: no
mitsukaisvotary: remember the last time we chatted, i went the the hospital that night ,
Mistress Mitsukai: and what happened?
mitsukaisvotary: they admitted me cause ofthe extreme anxiety and chest pains
Mistress Mitsukai: Ugh
Mistress Mitsukai: Alright, and then?
mitsukaisvotary: tests
Mistress Mitsukai: Wow.
Mistress Mitsukai: Tests, exciting.
Mistress Mitsukai: Then?
mitsukaisvotary: no heart attack
Mistress Mitsukai: Wow.
Mistress Mitsukai: you’re kidding!
Mistress Mitsukai: Surprise, surprise!
Mistress Mitsukai: What then?
mitsukaisvotary: he saids he never saw`such fear
Mistress Mitsukai: Crazy.
mitsukaisvotary: yea i guess
Mistress Mitsukai: you don’t think maybe it was an anxiety attack brought on by a phobia, do you?
Mistress Mitsukai: I mean, that’d make a lot of sense.
Mistress Mitsukai: Fucking crazy.
Mistress Mitsukai: Heart attack.
Mistress Mitsukai: Jesus.
mitsukaisvotary: i never had anything like that before ,
Mistress Mitsukai: Both you and the doctor are a bunch of morons.
mitsukaisvotary: i didnt have one
Mistress Mitsukai: Didn’t have one what?
mitsukaisvotary: the test showed i didnt have a heart attack
Mistress Mitsukai: No shit.
Mistress Mitsukai: I could have told you that.
Mistress Mitsukai: In fact, I believe I did.
mitsukaisvotary: i know
mitsukaisvotary: yes
Mistress Mitsukai: I told you what was going on and how to fix it.
Mistress Mitsukai: But someone decided he was going to not trust me.
mitsukaisvotary: yes
Mistress Mitsukai: and look at that.
mitsukaisvotary: yes
Mistress Mitsukai: A motherfucking anxiety attack.
Mistress Mitsukai: you don’t say.
Mistress Mitsukai: you’re an idiot.
mitsukaisvotary: yes Majesty
Mistress Mitsukai: Go blog about it.
mitsukaisvotary: what should i say
Mistress Mitsukai: you can tell your readers all about how I tried to get your information out of you even though I had it, and even though you had a phobia.
Mistress Mitsukai: and that I kept pushing you and taunting you.
Mistress Mitsukai: Until you broke down.
Mistress Mitsukai: and you in all your wisdom thought it was a heart attack.
Mistress Mitsukai: I told you otherwise, but you paraded your ass to the hospital.
Mistress Mitsukai: Where the doctor took advantage of your moronic ass who was obviously having a panic attack and ran a bunch of tests.
Mistress Mitsukai: Let me guess, big bill for all those tests?
mitsukaisvotary: yes
Mistress Mitsukai: Fucking hell.
Mistress Mitsukai: That’s a surprise.
mitsukaisvotary: insurance pays though
Mistress Mitsukai: So?
Mistress Mitsukai: It’s the same idea.
Mistress Mitsukai: That asshole knew you were having panic attacks.
Mistress Mitsukai: It’s textbook.
Mistress Mitsukai: So you can talk about all your tests.
Mistress Mitsukai: and how you sheepishly came back to tell me what I already knew.
Mistress Mitsukai: That you had a goddamned panic attack.
Mistress Mitsukai: and ran to the hospital like a baby.
Mistress Mitsukai: Now go write your entry.
mitsukaisvotary: the question in my mind is what has happened , im terified of you, and i look up to you like i never vhave anyone, you are a deity to me now
mitsukaisvotary: yes Majesty
mitsukaisvotary: im during as you ordered
mitsukaisvotary: i see you are loolking for a live in slave
Mistress Mitsukai: Wrong.
Mistress Mitsukai: I don’t want it living with me.
mitsukaisvotary: i understand
mitsukaisvotary: i meant near
mitsukaisvotary: like i am going to do hopefully
mitsukaisvotary: posted
mitsukaisvotary: if you dont approve ill change it in anyway pleasing to you
Mistress Mitsukai: Checking.
mitsukaisvotary: ty
Mistress Mitsukai: you forgot about puking.
mitsukaisvotary: do i have to include that
Mistress Mitsukai: Yes.
mitsukaisvotary: please`check
Mistress Mitsukai: So when I sent you up to bed did you think that you were having a heart attack, that I was lying to you about the panic attack, and that I was attempting to kill you?
mitsukaisvotary: no
mitsukaisvotary: i tried to lie down and breath as you instructed but i kep remembering i disobeyed you and with each rememberance i got more and more scared, i had incredible chest pain and could hardly breath. i tried praying to you but you werent there like you usually are when i pray, i cried and thre up again and thought i better go to the ER
mitsukaisvotary: i havent prayed to you since that night
Mistress Mitsukai: Then you should do so now.
mitsukaisvotary: i feel so depressed so broken so desolate its hard to describe how i feel
mitsukaisvotary: can i come back after prayer and discuss with you how i am feeling i feel so desolate and depressed please may i come back after prayer to you
Mistress Mitsukai: you may
mitsukaisvotary: ty Majesty i be back in like 10-15 min ok